Ogden Nash
People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they really don't want it.
Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long.
I think that I shall never seea billboard lovely as a tree.Perhaps, unless the billboards fall,I'll never see a tree at all.
People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.
Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore,And that's what parents were created for.
Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.
A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.
Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
Sometimes with secret pride I sigh,To think how tolerant am I;Then wonder which is really mine:Tolerance, or a rubber spine?
When there are monsters there are miracles.