Bob Hope
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
Middle age is when your age starts to show around the middle.
I don't generally feel anything until noon; then it's time for my nap.
Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.
I don't know if the presidential candidates are running for the White House or Animal House.
No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties.
If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play at it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.